My son just ate his first Junior Mint!

His face makes this cartoon character expression – eyebrows up, eyes wide, mouth open – every time he tries something he thought would be verboten. It’s the type of expression that Hollywood tries to replicate in movies like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory or Mary Poppins, but never have I seen it so genuine, so virgin, as I have seen on my son’s face when he finds out he can eat what’s on offer. Today Junior Mints earned his rapture.

Does this photo not make Junior Mints look good enough to eat?!?! Thanks Ellboy for this great shot!

That’s right, I’m blogging about what my family ate today. Before your eyes roll, before you groan about yet another mommy blog, before you spit back: “Been there, done that!” give me a chance to explain.

Standing in the grocery line, skimming the gossip magazine headlines, my eyes drift over to the impulse buy rack. It suddenly hits me: Nothing about Junior Mints seems natural, the surest sign my dairy-free bubble-boy can eat them! He’s allergic to milk and mushrooms. It’s not an intolerance. It’s not an aversion. He’s full-on, welt up, body rejects it, allergic. Really, it’s surprising my genetic line has survived at all. You see, I’m also allergic to eggs.

It’s actually pretty easy for a 10-year-old boy to decline cream of mushroom soup and mushroom rice pilaf, but refraining from dessert and Hallowe’en candy, is an award-winning feat.

Bed of candy

The kids have a whole trade system worked out so that she gets all of the chocolate. I never guessed that a vampire and he-who-shall-not-be-named could be so diplomatic.

I’ve never found it that hard to give up desserts and baking, because I’ve never known their pleasures, but he knows what he’s missing.

For his first eight years his allergies were undiagnosed, and he wrestled with the symptoms without knowing the cause. For the last two years, he has learned more about food and baking than most adults will ever understand. He also exercises more self-control than a supermodel stuck living above a pizza parlour, and you can understand why we celebrate when I discover some seemingly mundane garbage food that he can eat.

It might be junk food, but at least it’s not carob chips!

So, I’ve been thinking, perhaps I should share some of those ideas with fellow “meat eating vegans,” as I like to call us, because it’s not easy pretending that your kid can eat everything all of the other kids can eat. Here begins my next blog, full of tips for Meat Eating Vegans.

Live within limits without limiting life

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About ahemmayispeak

Environmentalist Egalitarian Engineer Writer There, I finally said it. View all posts by ahemmayispeak

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